So, this is it today I have decided to step out of my shell and build this blog. I’m being honest when I say this, I have no clue how to build a blog. I don’t know how to structure them or anything about the entire process. So, I expect this could be a pretty new and exciting thing for me.
My reasons for why I decided to make a blog? Well, I would have to say the idea came over me sitting in bed bored and angry. I no longer remember what it was I was angry about. What I do remember is feeling like I had a whole lot to say but no one to listen to me. It all sounds silly now. But the real reason I decided to start this blog is that I have been on a bit of a serious self- discovery mission.
What is a self-discovery mission?
Well, I am happy to tell you, for me it is me making a lot of lists, sitting up all night contemplating life and driving my husband crazy while doing it. What am I looking for? Yet again, I am still very unsure. What I do know is, this adventure began a couple years ago when my mom and gram found out they were ill with cancer. One diagnosed right after the other. As hard as the struggle as I tried my best to make every moment with them count. All the while it seems all the pressure in my life at the time was slowly leading me to a mental breakdown.
After many long months of both of them striving to fight the good fight, the inevitable finally hit. My grandma went first, several months later my mom past too. A few days later completely out of the blue my uncle that I was also very close to past away as well. As if it wasn’t hard enough already, my heart broken family was completely emotionally and physically shattered. All of this plus my already imperfect life sent me straight over the edge.
So, after all the above I finally decided it was time to pull myself back together. That very decision led me to do an endless break down of my life. Every day one piece of my life at a time. Mid-2015 is when I started to put my life back together. It is currently the beginning of 2018 and I have to say I have come so far. I just still don’t feel as if I’m where I want to be yet. The thing I will say is I did find myself. The search is still not thru though, even though I was back but now I need to sew the pieces of myself back together the way they should be while I do that I also need to start moving forward with my life. Acceptance has been a big part of my process.
The moving forward version of this mission is, me literally making up my moves one day after another. It’s me doing simple things like starting a blog. Me stepping out of my comfort zones and pushing past whatever it is that holds me back. Accepting my inner truths, which is a combination of so many things. Taking a good look at your inner self and then taking everything, I’ve learned and now trying to self-improve. It sounds so much easier than it actually is. So here I am building a blog about The Crazy Pursuit of Life, using all of my crazy beautiful memories and experiences.
I’m going to use this blog as an outlet for me to express my feelings and views of the world, as I know and see it. I’m going to use it to let my inner self-be free without hesitation and to reach people. People like myself who are having anxiety or stress about life. People dealing with life struggles. People that just want to be and achieve so much more than they are and have at this moment. I want to show women that don’t have much, that there is a way for them to have more. I want to show men that women are more than just an object and that being a man doesn’t mean they can’t express and feel too. I want the whole world to hear me roar. I want to spread knowledge and understanding of realistic things that happen every day in regular households, in regular families. I don’t know if I can accomplish all the above or even how long I’ll even do this for. But I figured I’d wing it, take a shot and see where it takes me. I am new to the blog world, so I have absolutely no clue what I’m doing and that’s okay. This is me stepping out on a limb to reach new heights and make new dreams happen. So, I guess we shall see where this goes.
Thanks for reading: